I am a breast feeding mumma and I am going to declare that is how far my breastfeeding expertise goes before I go on any further. I had slight grazing of the nipples on day 2 of feeding which healed quickly, I have never had any supply issues and I have never bought a tin of formula.

Reading through some mummies groups on social media and internet forums, it is becoming very apparent that there is a severe lack of antenatal support for women when it comes to breastfeeding. Daily I read posts of women who are very anxious about things that are very normal to breastfeeding and sometimes it’s these things that lead new mums to prematurely stop breast feeding and feel an enormous amount of guilt that they have failed their baby.

Before the 20th century women stuck together and babies were raised by the community around them. Mother’s supported their daughters teaching them how to feed, swaddle, look for babies cues for tiredness and hunger etc. Then in the 20th century women started being sent home from the hospital with tins of formula and told to put their baby on the bottle, in turn creating a society where women don’t feel supported and breastfeeding in public is now frowned upon.

I desperately wanted breastfeed because of the family history of food allergies, diabetes, eczema and well, it’s free and I’m a tight arse. So I read every book I could get my hands on, had a lactation consultant come to my house before Master Menzies was born, went to antenatal classes and spoke to my best friend who had successfully breastfed all three of her babies. The midwives in the hospital even asked if I was sure that I hadn’t done this before because I seemed to be a natural. Well I wasn’t, I was educated, breastfeeding does not come naturally to everyone, and that is a myth that needs to be busted.

Once you have your breastfeeding journey sorted out and you are over the hurdles and have driven through the stop signs, it can be the most wonderful bonding experience you can have with your baby. It gives you the opportunity to soak in your baby’s touch and smell, take time to have a cuddle (when they become a wriggler, like Master Menzies, feeding time may be the only cuddles you get during the day) and enjoy your baby. But you need to get over the hurdles and drive through the stop signs, which you will realise are only give way signs, in order to breastfeed for as long as you want to.

Now that Master Menzies is 14 months old (where the hell did that time go), he is biting far too regularly and I am returning to full time work in the next week, I have decided to fully wean him off the boob. We are down to one feed a day, but I just can’t bring myself to stop that feed yet. I am relishing in the new found freedom I have of being able to confidently leave my baby to be cared for by others and not worry they haven’t put expressed milk in the microwave, or that I am going to leak everywhere or that I have to be back by a certain time to feed. But it is sad too, my baby is a toddler now and already becoming independent.

So mummas out there who want help breastfeeding, all you need to do is ask. If your health professional is saying give up breastfeeding and it is not what you want to do, get a second opinion.

I am not saying that formula feeding is the evil of all the Earth. It definitely has its place, my philosophy is that all we need to have is a happy and healthy baby. If formula is the way you need to keep your baby happy and healthy, there is nothing wrong with that.

Here’s a list of awesome resources that you can use to help you on your breastfeeding journey:

• The Australian Breastfeeding Association – https://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/
• Pinky McKay Breastfeeding blog – http://www.pinkymckay.com/blog/breastfeeding/
• Maternal and Child Health Live (Victoria) – http://www.education.vic.gov.au/childhood/parents/support/pages/mchline.aspx
• Baby Centre – http://www.babycenter.com.au/breastfeeding

It’s bloody awful when your baby gets sick for the first time. And it’s hard to know what to do because in some cases you can’t even tell that they are that sick. Master Menzies’  was fighting off a virus, which he has kindly shared with me and I felt like a truck had hit me. But not Master Menzies, he was playing with his toys, eating better than ever and smiling his way through the day. The only give away are the green snot bubbles and chesty cough and the extra nap he was having each day. It makes me start to think if babies can soldier on through an illness like that, why can’t we as adults?

Master Menzies is now 7 months old. I thought this would be way to young for distinct words rather than babbling sounds, but Master Menzies has been on the Mum train for a few days now. If you don’t know what I the Mum train its this -“Mum mum mum mum mum mum mum”… all day long. Sometimes we switch stations and we board the Dad train so we get “Dad dad dad dad dad dad dad dad dad dad”. For the first 3 days this was cute, but now I am I finding myself trying to teach a 7mo how to put it into context. Already this morning I have told him about 10 times that Dad is at work (we’ve only been awake for an hour) and that Mum mum mum is making breakfast, feeding you weetbix, wiping your face etc.

So we are all aboard the Mum and Dad train the the Menzies’ house. Toot! Toot! or should it be Mum, Mum, Mum!?

“Does Master Menzies sleep through the night yet?” I wish I had a dollar for every time I was asked this question.

Babies all have varied sleep patterns. I don’t think I have spoken to a single mother who’s baby has the same sleep pattern as Master Menzies or any other baby. Some mummies use rigid routines with their babies and some just follow their babies cues never finding predictability. Strict routines do not suit us but we have fallen into a routine by following Master Menzies’ needs. Routines from the bazillion baby books on the market can be an excellent way for new mummies to learn how much a baby should be sleeping and how to see their new little person’s sleep cues. Master Menzies goes to bed at 6pm because he just can’t handle himself after this time. It works well for Mr Menzies and I because we can have some time together, cook dinner and actually eat a warm meal together. If Mr Menzies and I want to go out for dinner then we can after Master Menzies has gone to bed and he won’t even know that he is being looked after by a babysitter. We have been advised to push him to 7pm so he’ll sleep longer. This will only give us a devil child for an hour a day, cold meals eaten separately again and a baby that will wake up at the same time as when we would have put him to bed at 6pm.

Master Menzies sleeps from 6pm, and that is where the predictability stops. He can wake at 1pm then every 2 hours after that or sleep right through to 5am. A ‘full’ nights sleep depends on any one of the following happening or not happening.

• A growth spurt
• Teething
• Hunger
• Wants a cuddle
• Doesn’t want a cuddle
• It’s too cold
• It’s too hot
• The water pipes are banged
• Daddy is cooking dinner
• The heater kicked in
• The heater stopped… and so on.

Now I may have dug our own grave here but since the first couple of weeks Mr Menzies and I have had a very easy night times without any crying episodes. And this is due to one thing. The only way I use to settle Master Menzies is boobie. I gave up the rocking, shooshing or cuddling when none of it worked, only boobie works and that is perfectly fine, because that is what keeps my baby happy and Mr Menzies and I sane. It may be a hard habit to break but i am going with the hope that he will just grow out of it.

So tonight I am going to bed and hoping that we get the same deal as last night 6pm – 5am, a quick feed, and then up at 8am. Wish me luck!

So I’m stuck in a rut. I feel like everyday is just like the day before. The days roll into one, I try to do things each week to get out of the house, and now I have realised that my whole week is routine.

Monday – housework

Tuesday – Baby Rhyme Time at the local library

Wednesday – Grocery shopping

Thursday – Playgroup

Friday – Playgroup

Saturday/Sunday – Family commitments

and repeat…

Well I’m breaking the rut! It’s about time this Mumma found something else to do, something that I can do that I can call my own. So I am dusting the cobwebs off the old sewing machine and I’m going to start creating again. I keep seeing teepees on Facebook and Pinterest, and I want one for myself. I can just imagine sitting in that teepee, with a cup of coffee and reading a magazine. And when Master Menzies is old enough, I might even share it with him.

So in pulling myself out of the mummy rut I will (hopefully) be resurrecting a hobby I had BB (before baby) and creating a hiding place just for me so I can’t see the dishes, laundry, vacuuming, mopping, dusting, wiping or tidying that needs to be done.

I don’t know what was happening in Master Menzies’ cradle this morning, but at 6:34am he found it hilarious. Mr Menzies and I woke up to laughter, Master Menzies was in his element. It is times like this that make all of the night time feeds and the turning down of invitations all worth it. There truly is nothing better in the world than seeing your baby smile and hearing their laughter.

This unfortunately was followed with a day of frustration. At 3 months Master Menzies is trying to roll over. He gets to his side and can not figure our how to get all the way over to his front. This lead me to have one very frustrated young man all day today, but he has gone to bed early tonight out of exhaustion from all of that hard work. I just hope he stays there like usual and doesn’t wake up too long after midnight for a feed.

Master Menzies has found his hands. In the last couple of days he brings them together and uses both hands to reach out for objects. Not a great feat I know for the adult world, but in the land of the new mummy, this is equivalent to man landing on the moon. He can finally do something new, it’s been a few weeks since we had his new skill of smiling to gloat about.

On top of the discovery of hands we are also trying to roll over. Once that happens, then I’ll have my hands full. Already we can’t have leave him alone on the bed or couch because he is a master of the crab crawl.

It’s all happening so quickly, Master Menzies definitely isn’t a newborn anymore. It’s awesome watching him grow and achieve new milestones but I am already seeing the time fly by.

My favourite thing in the whole wide world seeing Master Menzies smile and laugh. All of my worries and exhaustion just melts away and I get swept up in the moment looking at my little person being as happy as he possibly can be in that moment.

Until he began to smile it was hard. It was hard putting my soul into making sure this little person had all he needed and getting nothing in return. Now I get something in return. I get a smile when he wakes up. I get a giggle when he pushes off the change table and out of his nappy that I am trying to put on him.

The smiles and the laughter make everything worth it. The late nights, cluster feeds, poo explosions and I’d hate to say it, the change of my identity of who I am as a person. He is everything to me, and he has the cheekiest little face that makes everything worth while.